So I decided to make New Year's Resolutions?

Hello, hello, helllooooo!

As 2013 comes to a close, I have really no choice but to think about all the blessings that I have experienced this year. So many wonderful things, so many wonderful people, and so many wonderful examples of God working in my life. 

As another year comes around, I decided to make a few resolutions this year. Of course, I want to exercise and eat healthy, but I'm gonna skip those this year and try to come up with a few things that are more meaningful and perhaps may benefit other people besides myself. 

New Year's Resolutions for 2014:

1. Do more things to brighten people's day. For example, if I get great customer service, I'm going to call up the place and tell the manager. 

2. Never raise my voice. (I know this is a gonna be a toughie, especially in the time I spend at home.)

3. Make a better habit of making time for God in my life.

4. When I say I will pray for someone, I want to actually consciously take the time away and do it. 

5. Do something cool and out of the ordinary. I don't know what this is going to be, but I want to do something kinda crazy, something out of my reserved character. 

I'm sure there are many things that I need to strive to do in the upcoming year, but I'd say five is a solid number.

January 2, 2014 REVISED
I have two more things to add.
6. Develop my housewife skills
7. Run a 5k. 

Happy New Year!

♥LHDK

So I decided I'm ready for the next phase?

'ello!

Okay, first of all. Every time I hear the word "phase" I think of the three years that I spent in braces. Phase 1 and Phase 2. I had some messed up teeth, so these phases may (or may not) have repeated at least twice. 

Anyway, not that my braces are interesting or this post will be either, but that's not the phase I am thinking about. This idea or concept has probably been brewing for awhile now, but I feel like I am ready for the next step of life of being on my own. My first year of college, I was always counting down the days until I could go home and see my family again. I was like that at the beginning of this year a little too, but lately I have definitely not felt that "need" to go home. With a month long Christmas break approaching, I can't say I'm crazy excited to be home for a whole month. Don't get me wrong, I absolutely love my family to pieces. I am still excited to see them and can't wait to laugh and share stories with them. It's just that I feel like I am ready to let go of the rope that ties me to them. I am ready to be on my own. In an essence, I am since I'm a college student. 

Another thing that may be adding to this feeling is my desire to get out of this one room dorm room. I can't complain too much, I don't mind living here. It has a lot of perks, but I live in one room and share a bathroom with 50 other girls. My kitchen table is my bed or my desk. Privacy is non-existent. I just want a TV and a couch. That last part sounds a little crazy, I know.

Also, since this little enlightening, I really want to go on a mission trip. I'm also thinking about this summer, and I just wanna do something that is awesome. Something that's more empowering than working at a donut shop. Just some ideas... 

But what do I know? A crazy little college girl with no income can't just do whatever she wants. 

They'd call that girl Loco Cocoa. I'm gonna pray about it, and if anyone reads this: can you say a quick prayer for me too?

Love, 

LHDK

So I decided that Sunday is like a day of love?

HEY.

There's something about Sundays. I kinda like 'em. 

Aside from the fact that it's the day before the dreaded Monday, Sundays always seem to be a day full of love, like Valentine's Day only not quite as awful?

I love going to church on Sundays.

I thought today's service was absolutely wonderful. Inspiring songs and an impacting message make for a great hour and a half. I love the church that I go to here on campus. I get so much more out of it than I do from my church back home. 

I love family. 

Back before this whole college thing, my mom's side of the family used to have Family Game Nights on Sundays. I always think of Sundays as the day for family, for spending time together and relaxing. I long for those days back, but I know it's possible that those are gone (at least for awhile.) I hope that when I have my own kids, perhaps we could have the whole family gathering on Sundays again. I FaceTimed my family tonight though, just to say hey.

I love love. 

This may not be a regular Sunday thing, but today I've really noticed other people's love for each other. One obvious one was that one of my friends posted a song on Facebook that her fiance wrote for her titled "Love, Love, Love." It was adorable and so cute to hear him express his lasting love for her. Another love thing was today in church, the speaker was telling a story about his parents' marriage and how they always struggled. About 7 years ago, they found out that his mother was cheating on his dad. But instead of ending their marriage and calling it quits, it has made their marriage so much better. I think it is so awesome to see a couple be that committed to each other and take those vows that they made seriously. I think it such an inspiration and proof that you can do that. That's what I want. When I make that vow, that's gonna be it. 

I just have a memory of Sundays that might be why I like them, I don't know. 

Before my brother was born and my parents were still married, sometimes on the way home from church, we would go to Burger King and get our lunch. We would go through the drive-thru and then my mom would let me hold the bag. I was allowed to eat one fry on the way home/ Let's be honest, I snuck a few fries. Sometimes they would be really hot so I would hold the fry out the window to cool it down. I laugh thinking about my long haired, chubby cheeked self dangling a fry out the window of the backseat of our silver Intrepid. Good times, good times. 

Happy Sunday!

Love,

LHDK

So I decided my life is one big bundle of confusion?

Hi. 

So it just seems that in between my posts, I just roll up in a ball of confusion. Lately life has been super de duper confusing. I might as well begin with the most confusing issue that quite frankly cannot be ignored right now.

What is a God pleasing relationship? 

I don't know. No one seems to. Which has led to what happened yesterday. My boyfriend said that he felt that we should stop kissing. (SIDE NOTE: Sometimes I say things and then I ask myself where the heck the strength to say that came from) Without even thinking, I said "Okay." Now let me tell you, this is a crazy concept for two people who have been dating for almost a year and a half. In my head, it's basically become a game. Can we win? I don't lose, so there really isn't an option. :) 

Would I have suggested this myself? Mmmmm... probably not. Yes, I have considered it, even read books about it but my own selfishness tends to come first. (Which is not good!) 

Was I gonna argue about it? Not a chance. Though I may not agree or understand 100%, I knew in my heart that he is probably right. A friend asked me if I was going to hash it out since the Bible says that women should submit to their husbands (interpreted as boyfriend) and that's that. It is not my place to argue about this, but rather to agree and accept what he feels. 

PLOT TWIST.

Today we were discussing it again and he said that he had been rethinking it and maybe it was okay to kiss. 

So basically, we're just two confused twenty year olds that are crazy in love, and we don't know what to do about it. That's a pretty accurate summary. 

And then there is the little bump in the road of my career uncertainty. I have really been feeling a little tug lately that I want to be like a children's director at a church. Or a librarian. 

So there's that.

Love, 

LHDK

So it's a mixed up kind of day?

Hello.

Tonight I skipped my small group, ate two donuts, and then I just cried. 

Sounds to me like I'm spiraling down into a deep hole of utter despair...this didn't occur to me until I began to write this!

So here we go.

I know I shouldn't have skipped my small group, but the only reason I go anymore is because I know that is the right thing to do. Last year, I had an incredible small group and this year just simply isn't standing up to that. When I go, I always look at my watch and want to know how much longer it will be until we can leave. Last year, we would talk and talk for hours and I never cared about the time. It's not that I don't love Jesus and I don't want to grow in my faith, it's simply that I'm not getting what I want out of it. I should really pray about it and stop complaining.

The donuts. Well, my roommate wanted donuts so we got some and we each ate two. The end. 

And the cause of my tears... When I was 7th grade, my youth pastor was killed in a car accident and tomorrow is the 7 year anniversary of that happening. Just reading people's posts on Facebook made me tear up and realize many things. One is obviously that life is so fragile and can be taken away so fast simply by driving to work in the morning. That's kinda scary. Also, it saddens me to think that his children will never know and remember him as their father. It just breaks my heart. There's a Garth Brooks song called, "If Tomorrow Never Comes," and one of the lines is "If tomorrow never comes, will you know how much I love you?" This really makes me more conscious of how I act towards people when I leave them. If I don't say I love you to my parents before I leave or they leave, I never know if that will the last time I get to say it. It also spurs me sometimes to just randomly text people and tell them "Hey, I think you're a really great person and I'm glad you're in my life." Because you simply never know... 

Amor,

LHDK

So I decided that I should proofread my posts?

Welp, this is embarrassing. 

I have been repeatedly signing my name with the wrong initials. 

LHDK.

LHDK.

LHDK.

LHDK.

Okay, I think I got it now. 

So I decided that I am a jenk blogger?

Whaddddupppp. 

So I decided that I should really blog more often. Not that anyone even reads this, I'm aware of that. It's all good. It feeds my need to let some stuff out and gives an artificial feeling that people care. Ha that just sounds depressing. It's really not.

It's been longer than a month since I last posted anything, not surprised. So much has happened since then, it's awful crazy. Starting school back up has definitely made my life about 700x crazier than it was over the summer, but that's okay. It keeps me busy and out of trouble! :)

The last month has definitely been filled with some struggles, both big and small. But that's okay. What is life without a few little speed bumps or sharp turns? These have really assured me of something that I thought I already knew, and quite frankly that's pretty great. I believe that God uses tough situations to help you out sometimes, and that's pretty stinkin' cool. 

I've been trying to channel my inner social butterfly this semester. Not an epic failure, but it's not like friends are crashing down my door to hang out with me. In fact, I just watched 5 episodes of Parks and Rec, decided I should do something constructive so I watched wedding proposals. Hellllllloooo world, I'm here and ready to party! ;) 

My coffee addiction is for real now. I need my daily caffeine or proper functioning does not occur. 

Oh! And I had a birthday! My first birthday away from home. That was weird.

My laundry is waiting for me. Don't want these goofy college kids to steal it from me! My teddy bear shirt only looks super cute on me!

Peace out, girl scout.

Love, 

LHDC